WARNING: Retards Write is a patent, trademark, 'copyrite' of Sam the Eagle Enterprises and the Eatafly Foundation. Any implications or inferences that Philip Klein writes letters to himself, no matter how pathetic.......is unfortunately true.FROM.....UH.....HOUSTON:
Der Sam, I em a....uh.....lewer......yea....thets it....a lewer frum Houston. U r kurrupt. All uf u r kurrupt. Philip Klien axposes hemself so thet evryonee knues u r kurrupt.
Lewer
ANSWER: silly Philip
FROM SARASOTA:
Dear Sam, We never punished Philip for making B's. We were actually quite proud when he made a B once. We did punish him for lying. He was in trouble quite a bit as a child.
Ma Klein
ANSWER: Thanks Ma. 'We' know you tried.
FROM HOUSTON:
Sam, Philip never studied reading, writing, or math.
Mrs. Perrimore
ANSWER: So much for the 'No child left behind' program.
FROM SARASOTA:
Dear Sam, my wife recently wrote you an email. I'm sorry, she hasn't been herself lately. We don't have a son named Philip.
Pa Klein
ANSWER: I understand.
